Not all addicts are violent, and not all domestic abusers are addicts, but there are some who fall into addiction and domestic violence. The statistics say 40% to 60% fall into both categories.
For the spouse of the addict and abuser, it can be overwhelming. For the addict and abuser, it can create more negative feelings and guilt causing them to spiral into more substance abuse. It can become a vicious cycle for both.
Warning signs of substance abuse and domestic violence
If you have a loved one who is in a situation that may be the result of substance abuse and domestic violence in Orange County, here are signs you need to look for:
- Jealousy or controlling behavior
- Threats of violence toward your kids or taking the kids away from you
- Showing weapons to intimidate you
- Belittling you in front of others
- Hurting or killing the pets
- Controlling all the finances, so you have to ask for money
- Damaging your items
- Not allowing you to make even basic decision as to when you eat or sleep without their approval
If you see any of these signs, you need to get help.
Help for the addict and help for the abused. Even when you love the person, being abused is not the answer.
Getting help for addiction and domestic abuse
For the substance abuser, alcohol or substance treatment is necessary. Find a rehab center that treats dual disorders and has family treatment or counseling as well. 449 Recovery in California has Family Group weekend the first weekend of every month.
All clients are highly encouraged to engage in the family weekend when it is appropriate. 449 Recovery believes in treating the family as well as the client and aims to provide an environment conducive to rebuilding the bonds broken by addiction.
The abused spouse should also seek counseling on their own to work through the trauma. Once the spouse has finished rehab, then the pair should seek couples therapy to continue working on the issues that led to substance abuse and domestic violence.
In rehab, the substance abuser will learn how to deal with feelings that can trigger a relapse and several other therapies that can help them with substance abuse, negative thinking, anger, and more.
Maintaining recovery and stopping domestic abuse
After the addict graduates from rehab, the domestic partners should have a grasp on what triggers substance abuse and domestic violence. At that point, you need to make a plan together to deal with negative thoughts, stress, and anxiety in the relationship.
Having a plan in place to deal with issues will help maintain sobriety and tranquility in the home. Eating healthy meals and exercise is a good start. Add to those healthy hobbies that you do separately and together. Everyone needs a couple of hours of downtime that they can recharge on their own. Also, continue with couples therapy. The more you deal with issues, the better it will go.