Are you enabling your loved one’s addiction? Do you cover for them? Give them money? How about excuses?
What is an enabler
An enabler or helper is when a family member or friend of an addict supports the addict’s use through behaviors or thoughts. Enabling includes the following:
- Avoidance of the problem
- Allowing the addict to use
- Squashing feelings
- Diminishing the addict’s use
- Protecting the family image
- Playing the blame game
- Assuming responsibilities
- Exerting controlling behaviors
The problem with being an enabler is that you lose respect for yourself and the family member who is the user also loses respect for you as well.
The reason you do not want to be an enabler in that it takes responsibility away from the user and will keep them from seeking help. Knowing what these behaviors are and stopping enabling the user the family can focus on helping the user into recovery.
Stopping enabling behaviors
Stopping the enabling behaviors can be tough but you need to do it. Helping your loved one into the proper treatment requires the following:
- Set boundaries
- Do not make excuses anymore
- Attend meetings for family members such as AA has Al-Anon meetings. There are also meetings for narcotics
- Participate in family counseling
- Fully commit to recovery
Stopping the enabling behaviors make the addict have to face the problems that substance abuse has created in their life. Financial burdens, relationship issues, and more. When they have no cushion from family and friends they begin to see what an issue their using really is. At this point, they may be receptive to you discussing recovery with them; just make sure that you do it in a loving tone and not a place of anger.
While you are waiting for the user to come around to recovery, you should find a program that will fit their needs. Let them know that when they are ready to recover you will help them with a program and even go to any counseling meetings for the family with them.
A good recovery facility should offer a clean safe space with a caring atmosphere that offers several therapies for recovery. Find out what insurance will cover if the user has insurance. Do they do detox programs? Ask, what are the tools the user will learn to reduce the risk of relapse?
At 449 Recovery, helping each client overcome every challenge on the road to recovery is our greatest goal. We believe that healing is best obtained in an environment that will encourage it. The endless monitored detoxification, in conjunction with long term treatment programs at 449 Recovery are provided in a caring and structured atmosphere. Our goal is to execute practices that will leave a lifelong impact on the recipients. We aim for no one to leave unchanged, but for everyone to lead a happier and healthier lifestyle. Give us a call at (855) 435-7449 to gain more insight into our all-inclusive alcohol and drug addiction treatment program today!