When getting an AA sponsor questions are usually running through our heads at a mile a minute. Unfortunately, especially when we first start out, most of these are the wrong kinds of questions. Here are some of the most basic AA sponsor questions you should ask. Note too that whether you are in AA, NA, CA, MA, etc, the questions are the same.
AA Sponsor Questions
First and foremost, you should find out how long your potential sponsor has been sober. Not because of some hierarchy, but because there are some people who get sponsors find out later down the line that they are not actually sober! If your AA sponsor questions what you mean by “sober,” chances are you should look elsewhere.
Finding out whether your sponsor has actually worked the steps all the way through is also pretty key information. Yes, some of us do actually forget to ask this. While a sponsor does not necessarily have to be “finished” making his or her amends, it is important to know what steps your sponsor is currently working on. If they answer 10, 11, and 12 (possibly also 9), then you may have a keeper. However, that does not mean that only those who have made it to that point are valid sponsors. In reality, this is a grey area, but it can help give you a better idea of where your potential sponsor is in his or her own program.
You might also want to ask if your potential sponsor is working with any other alcoholics or addicts. For some people, this is a dealmaker or –breaker. Some people need the extra availability, while others do better with a more hands-off approach. Also, if someone is working the Steps with another alcoholic or addict, then that is a pretty good indication that they, too, are probably immersed in the Steps are well.
Further, you should probably find someone whose program, life, and/or personality you respect—or at the very least someone you don’t mind calling and asking for help. Not everyone does well with the drill sergeant approach much in the same way in which not everyone does well with the laidback guy who is equally fine with you calling him or not calling him.
What are some of the NA or AA sponsor questions you ask? What is important to you in a sponsor?